I've should have gone back to school in September - and for the first time in FOREVER I didn't.
So the truth is:
sometimes badly
That's not said with drama, that's just the telling the truth of the situation. I don't just feel happy-days-everything-is-good-in-life now - it would be a false picture if I pretended it's all magically easy.
Often when we make big or small changes it feels darn uncomfortable and hard, and we cope with some days better than others.
These are some of the ways I'm handling it:
1. Allowing the 'feel-bads'
Feeling the feelings.
I let any fear & self-doubt be in my body and I practice the 'stop button' - meaning thoughts don't keep feeding that feeling. I practice meditation & breathing and other nervous system stuff too.
That means the 'feel-bads' are allowed to come and go.
I remind myself that these feelings are messengers - they are there because I care and because I do have a purpose in life.
I remind myself to believe (in my mind) and feel (in my heart) that I will figure it out.
I remind myself I am SO grateful to have a purpose - grateful for every session, every client, every small, ordinary thing and moment in my work that is wonderful.
2. I'm seeing a therapist/counsellor
At the moment, I have more instability than I've ever had before, both financially and emotionally
I have questions like 'what am I going to DO', and 'WHAT IF', not enough clients etc, then add in a bigger mortgage, the cost of living crisis, energy costs soaring etc... self-employed or not, I am sure many of you have similar fears.
And I finally left school aged 32!
That is a lot of change in and of itself.
I've had a decade of high-stress & high-intensity (and that has also been a choice too, not just something that happened to me),
That means that high-stress is a place where my nervous system now feels safe and at home. My body feels safe in routine, even if that routine is, ultimately, unsustainable and harmful.
I don't want to live in that state any more - so the outside help is helping me understand and giving me tools to break the cycles of burnout, the drive to over-achieve, hyper-productivity, the unconscious coping mechanisms, and the ways I create relationships and communicate etc.
It has helped me have a deeper seat within myself - a place of calm that is within me, not based on what is outside of me.
3. I'm being patient & I know my why
I don't have to have all the answers right now.
I can't think or stress myself to any solutions, but I can accept that fear and doubt are normal parts of the process.
If we didn't reach beyond what we already know, we wouldn't ever grow.
And that growth takes time.
I've built my business as a side hustle over 4 years.
I'm prepared to put in many more years to create the change I want to see in the world.
To see more women step into their power, create energy and vitality and own their health in a way that changes the world.
To grow a circle of women who together create an intoxicating, joyful feeling of LIFE within themselves, and together as a group
Who could we be if we woke up in the best health of our lives - mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually?
So.
What fears do you have?
How can you choose to handle them?
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